No More Mrs Nice Girl – Divorce Coaches Plead with Women to Harden Up
On the Life Change Index Scale stress test, divorce ranks number two – second only to the death of a spouse in life's most stressful events. It is stressful, it's emotional, and it can be difficult to imagine getting through it when everything feels so raw.
Unfortunately, this is why divorcing women are often extra nice and conciliatory when it comes to striking a divorce agreement and custody arrangement. The divorcing wife feels the need to get it over and done with as quickly as possible, often to spare the children from the extra stress and trauma of a difficult divorce. Rather than fighting for a fair settlement, sometimes women give in.
On the surface, that seems like a noble thing to do. But as a result, many women don't receive a fair settlement – and the financial and emotional impacts can be far-reaching. Nobody wants to embark on a fractious divorce, especially if there are children to co-parent. However, negotiating a fair divorce can be achieved without a bitter court battle.
The Right Help Makes a Big Difference
"Divorce is such a hard time. It's natural to want to get through the process as quickly and amiably as possible. But being extra flexible now can lead to a decade or more of financial and emotional struggles,” says Brisbane Divorce Coach Marg Doherty of Divorce Hub.
Instead, divorcing women should take this opportunity to empower their children and show everyone that you can be cordial without being a doormat. You are negotiating not just for your future but also for your children's.
However, it's hard to fight for what you deserve and it's even harder to remain cordial with someone who hurt you, especially if your soon-to-be ex-spouse isn't empathetic to your situation.
This is when a Divorce Coach can make a difference. They don't just dispense legal advice. They provide you with emotional support, and help you separate the financial agreement from the intense emotions you're experiencing. A divorce coach is key to ensuring you don't give away too much.
“The difference between your divorce coach and your divorce lawyer is that your coach will help you navigate the process with 100% clarity – which is so hard to achieve when there's so much stress around you,” Marg says.
In addition to helping you achieve a fair financial agreement, you can rely on your divorce coach to help you process difficult emotions. They can connect you with a qualified counsellor and work on improving your communication, helping you to see past the emotional turmoil that can cloud your judgment.
Make the Right Choices Now
The decisions you make during your divorce will impact you for years to come. That's why it's so important to have someone fighting beside you. Professional divorce coaching services can be time- and money-saving. In addition, a divorce coach can support you through some of the post-divorce issues many people overlook.
With genuine support and guidance, divorce coaching can help you navigate unchartered territory as you adjust to your new normal. If you are separated or planning a divorce, reach out to a Certified Divorce Coach for assistance as you embark on the next chapter in your life.
